Even with all I do to keep stress in check, life still gets overwhelming. When I have a lot on my plate my tendency is to isolate and shift into workaholic mode. If you have high expectations of yourself, it’s easy to feel like you’re not doing enough, so you have to do more and work harder to feel like you’re achieving at your desired level.
I was having these feelings a few weeks ago, and suddenly, in a flash, they went away. Why? My best friend arrived in town for a visit.
Neither of us was in vacation mode. We were both on our computers working away and both had meetings with clients in the midst of our visit. However, her presence grounded and calmed me, and all that I was stressing over suddenly felt more manageable, and honestly, hardly worth the stress. I was able to re-prioritize and focus on what needed my immediate attention, take care of things in a timely manner, and get back to enjoying my time with her.
Stress and anxiety are not productive, limiting your efficiency and creativity. Sometimes lighting a fire under your ass can be a good a thing if it springs you into positive action, but if you allow feelings of overwhelm to take over, the action can seem more like a chore than an energizing experiencing. Then you moan and complain and feel sorry for yourself, and nothing good can come of that.
Isolating myself with huge blocks of time to work and no clear stopping point is the opposite of productive for me. It only makes me feel more stressed, lonely, and frustrated.
When I make time to be with people with whom I am closely connected, who provide me with positive support and uplifting energy, I am reminded of my basic human need for love and affection. Being with friends and family is my favorite thing about being alive, helps to balance my energy, and ultimately makes what I offer to you richer and more meaningful.
Soon after my best friend left town, I spent a magical 2 weeks in Toronto visiting some of my most beloved friends and family, and reconnecting with my Trinidadian culture (which, believe it or not, thrives in abundance in Toronto). It was spirit juice. I was able to put work aside and enjoy time playing, talking, laughing, and being fully present with people who love me deeply. Such a gift!
I am grateful to have people in my life with whom I can share these experiences and feel supported. Part of it is the blessing of being born into a very warm and loving family. However, the bulk of what I have today is because I choose to make a conscious effort to nurture the healthy relationships in my life and minimize the draining and toxic ones. These past few weeks have served as a crucial reminder that no matter what I have on my plate, making time to be with nurturing people in my life is of pivotal importance to my health, wellbeing, and enjoyment of life. The same goes for you!
Take action now:
1) In the comments below, tell me about one person in your life that helps you to feel calmer, grounded, and nurtured.
2) Call/text/email someone you love and make a plan to spend some quality time together in the very near future (maybe today!).
3) Forward this to someone you love and remind them of how important they are to you and that you’re there for them.
Lots of Love,
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