If I asked you to name three things you wish you had more time for, what would you say?

For me, it’s making art, writing, and learning. There’s a book I want to write. I started learning Spanish but lost my rhythm after the hurricane. I enrolled in a project management course weeks ago and have made very little progress. My office floor is covered in newspapers and torn out pages of magazines for a quilting collage I’m working on, very sporadically.

I am the definition of multi-passionate and have always envied those that have a singular focus. If only there were just one thing I was obsessively devoted to, then imagine the progress I would make! And yet I know this issue of time would still be there. Because in addition to those passions, I have a full time job. I’m also passionately devoted to my health and wellbeing, and like to cook healthy meals for my partner and me to enjoy. I mildly obsess over my fitness level and physical condition, so exercise is a huge part of my life. Perhaps obsession number one is my little chihuahua and her daily fitness routine.

So you see, there’s a lot. I absolutely marvel at full time working parents. I just can’t imagine how you function.

Yet I’m sick of this issue of time. We have what we have and there’s no use stressing about it. What I was reminded of recently, because I know I’ve learned this lesson before, is that time is about choice. And as long as we consciously choose what we’re doing in any given moment, then time starts to feel much more spacious, malleable, enjoyable, expansive.

In my last blog post, I wrote about a power outage, and how good it felt to be untethered from my phone. Time spent on a phone, in apps, in chats, in messages is a choice and it’s one most of us make unconsciously, as though we’re beholden to the device. I talked about the in-between times. Those small moments when you mindlessly reach for your phone and start scrolling completely out of habit. Stopping yourself and choosing not to do that, choosing to do something else entirely is an option. Reach for something on your wish list instead. Or just stare into space and allow your imagination some room to breathe. Remember your imagination? It’s still in you.

Then there’s those other things that you’ve convinced yourself is an obligation, but is it really? For me, it’s cooking. I enjoy cooking, and more importantly, I enjoy eating the food I make. Cooking for myself is easy, but planning, shopping, and cooking for another individual is much more involved and time consuming. It takes up space in my brain and large chunks of my day. And I do it because if I don’t, what will he eat?? This is a full grown man who had absolutely no problem feeding himself before I entered his life. How silly of me to assume that it’s suddenly my job to make sure he eats a nourishing dinner every night.

Last night I didn’t want to cook. I wanted to draw. So I did that instead. And guess what? Neither of us went to bed hungry.